Am I Disappointed That My Blog Does Not Get Many Views?

I got asked the other day as to whether I am disappointed that my blog doesn't get many views, especially in comparison to how much effort I put into each and every post. The very fact that I am writing this blog post would suggest that I do, but perhaps not in the way that people would expect.

One thing that I do keep in mind is the fact that I have been a writer for many years, and therefore — despite my niggling doubts and the gap I have had in publishing a new book — it is all part of the process; in terms of just keeping going, and making sure that I am writing as much as I can without burning myself out. I suppose that person is right, because I certainly work hard; I have written a lot of posts, and I care deeply about the writing process and what I have to say. So for it not to look or feel as though it's not being read by a lot of people can be a struggle, because I'm putting a lot of effort into something and it doesn't always feel as though it's being received in the way that I would hope. At the same time, as much as I would like a large readership, I understand that everybody's writing is not for everybody.

Furthermore — especially in the case of my blog — I treat it a bit like an archive. In the sense that I have hundreds of posts, and there is an opportunity for somebody to go back years in time to see the specific topics that I was writing about. I can also see how I've developed as a writer over the years, and how life circumstances have potentially changed how I write a piece. Added to that, I do use my blog as a kind of blueprint; an opportunity to develop and test my writing. For example, you might have noticed that I wrote a few comedy monologues. Whilst I can appreciate that this is a niche thing to be writing about — and certainly a deviation from my usual writing — it was also an opportunity for me to be able to get the idea out of my head and experiment with it. It might be something that I want to expand upon later.  As it turns out, it's not something that I've wanted to go further with since, but at the same time, that's not to say that I wouldn't use it as a reference point in a later piece of writing. That is the whole point: I may be sharing my experience and my expertise on the writing process, but in doing that, people can forget that I'm still learning too. Even the most famous writers, such as Stephen King, are still learning. 

As I alluded to above, my blog is an opportunity to not only share my writing, but also the development. To better articulate this, in the study of English literature, a lot of consideration is given to the context of why and when a piece was written — and what may influence a writer to have included certain sentiments within their writing. I don't say this to sound grandiose: I can see how my writing has changed over a period of years, and that might be for the better or worse — but either way it is showing my development as a writer from one point to another. 

Readers may be interested in that because somebody might not like a blog post that I've written three weeks ago, but they might find a blog post that I've written two years ago and find it really interesting. They may realise that I have become more consistent and thorough in my editing process since.

As I have been writing a blog for so many years, there is quite a catalogue of writing that is free for potential readers to peruse. I often mention that my blogs can be read over a cup of coffee, so I try to make it so that it's not so much of a time commitment. I do appreciate that everybody is trying to squeeze all of the minutes out of their hours that they possibly can. With that in mind, it's quite a quick and accessible way of getting to know me as a person: literally through my writing, but also as a writer, and how I approach ideas. It is the hope, naturally, that you would read my blog and then I want to purchase one of my publications. However, I do appreciate that not everybody can afford the money or time to purchase someone's writing. They may just want to stick with the blog posts because it is free. I like to think that I write about a wide range of topics; many different perspectives. 

Just now, when I mentioned publications, I became acutely conscious that I haven't published a poetry anthology or book in quite a few years, and that is a guilt that I'm still grappling with. I would love to say that I have a book on its way — because I do have lots of pots boiling — but I am struggling with not having the mental energy to be consistent with my writing, which is something that I've mentioned a lot in previous blog posts.

I'm trying to be more consistent with the publishing of my blog posts, so that I can maintain a writing routine, but also take the pressure off myself (admittedly, this is pressure that I'm putting on myself!). Linked with that is the sense that when I struggle to be consistent, it's not a matter of not being disciplined enough, or organised enough; it is that I routinely reach a level of mental fatigue which means that I struggle to enjoy the things that I usually enjoy, and yet I still want to find the time to be able to dedicate that energy to writing. This has then compounded the guilt that I mentioned, and the fact that I haven't published in the last few years. Having said that, in building a routine, it may mean that I won't need to motivate myself in the same way.

The concept of a blog becomes very useful because of the idea of circular marketing: if you were to read a blog post, you may then like me as a person and my way with words, and then decide that you want to get to know me better as a writer through purchasing in one of my pieces of writing. Then, because you've done that, you may be more interested in exploring other bits of writing that I've done, and go from there. I described this above, but the point here is very different: I am not consistent with my writing, then people may forget that my writing exists, and by extension, my writing is not being seen by as many people. 

I'm trying to hone in on the idea that — just because I haven't published in a few years — it doesn't detract from my skill and passion for writing.

So, I think you can see that my main concern is not the fact that my blog posts don't seem to be getting many views, but rather what that actually means for my writing career, and what that means for my work as a writer. That is why I am trying to focus on the idea that my blog is an opportunity to explore different ideas and act as an archive. Theoretically, if I were to lose every piece of writing that I have published (a dreadful thought!), it would not have gone completely to waste, because it is a training ground. 

With that in mind, it's definitely worth mentioning that there is a huge difference between mental fatigue and a lack of discipline. A lack of discipline looks like letting yourself off easily and going for the easy option over what is beneficial for you in the long run. The mental fatigue I mention is entirely different. This is because of the frustration. If I wanted to give up, then I wouldn't be frustrated by the amount of mental fatigue that I end up feeling throughout the week. Perhaps I just need to remind myself that this is part of the process, and that it's not actually holding me back?